Coming Out!Posted: 4 months ago - Dec 10, 2022
For many new lesbians, coming out is one of the greatest fears and most difficult hurdles they have either overcome or will face in their lives. When I came out early last year, I had an incredible amount of fears and worries that almost stopped me from being true to myself.
What if my girlfriends don't accept me and don't want to be friends with me anymore? What if my family doesn't understand that I'm into women? What if people start insulting me on the street because of my sexual orientation?
But I wasn't really aware that coming out also brings wonderful things with it. I only found that out later. Especially if you still have your coming out ahead of you , I want to show you that coming out also brings many positive things into your life, even if you can't imagine it right now.
1. You will feel like you are 100% for the first time in your life. There is nothing better than finally feeling like you can be yourself, without having to live up to the expectations of others. No stress, nothing hidden.
2. You don't have to hide anymore. As long as you keep your sexuality as a secret, you have to hide yourself to some extent. After all, you don't want others to find out by accident that you're a lesbian. That's almost worse than just telling them. A secret like that makes you vulnerable. But if you are open about your sexuality, it will be easier for others to accept it. But if you treat it as something you're ashamed of and don't want anyone else to know, there's a higher chance that others won't be as cool about it when they found out by accident.
3. You can become part of the LGBT community. If you're out, you can connect to the LGBT community relatively quickly if you want to. Both online and offline, it's just easier to meet like-minded people when you no longer hide your sexual orientation.
The wonderful thing about the LGBT community is that you finally have people around you who feel the same way as you do. Who have the same questions, worries, and problems. With whom you can exchange ideas. Who can give you tips that your straight friends can't think of simply because their experiences are different from yours. The LGBT community is also a community that is mostly very welcoming of other LGBT people. We all know what it's like to be alone. And we all know how wonderful it is to be around people who feel the same way we do.
4. You can meet other lesbians. And make wonderful friends . You can't even imagine how nice it is to have people around you who understand you. who are like you. Who are perhaps a bit further than you in their coming out and self-discovery process and can therefore give you wonderful, helpful tips.
5. You can date other lesbians, and sooner or later meet the love of your life. When you're out, you can finally start dating other lesbians. As long as nobody knows about your sexuality, you will have a hard time going on dates. You'll be afraid that someone might see you. But this fear disappears after coming out. If you haven't come out yet, you probably feel insecure, maybe you don't even know where you can meet other lesbians, and you don't have any lesbian friends you can ask for advice.
After you come out, it will be a lot easier for you to start dating.
6. You can go to lesbian parties and Meet-Ups. When I finally came out and was at my first lesbian Meet-Up, I felt like I was in absolute paradise. There were so many people like me! I had never experienced such a beautiful event. Let's face it: As a lesbian, you're in the minority. And in the vast majority of cases and settings, the only outed person. Not so at such an event. Everyone here is like you! Which will, in addition to the great sense of community, also makes dating a lot easier.
7. You can go to gay pride events. And finally find out what this gay pride is all about. Believe me, the feeling of being able to be part of a gay pride event is absolutely exhilarating. You won't understand exactly what I mean until you've been there yourself. I went to my first in Long Beach this month. I canât wait to go to another one!
8. You will get compliments. As crazy as it sounds, straight people in particular often congratulate me on my coming out. This has happened to me more than once. I wish of course that we lived in a society in which it is not necessary to say such things. But unfortunately, we don't. And I'm pleased that many straight people also know that coming out is not easy, and support me in their own way. I would never have expected that before I came out!
9. You inspire others. It doesn't matter if it's your goal or not, but with your coming out, you will inspire others. Regardless of whether you are at school or university or work in a company: There is a high probability that there are other people in your environment who have not yet come out, either because they don't know it themselves or because they don't dare.
With your coming out, you are helping others to stand up for themselves.
10. You make the world a more beautiful place. Last but not least, you make the world a nicer place with your outing. You will become a role model for others, and you will be able to clear up prejudices in your environment.
Sometimes it is exhausting, having to explain everything over and over. But in most cases, homophobia is nothing more than fear of something that one doesn't know. And that fear is fueled by prejudice. This is exactly where you will start as an outed lesbian. Even if you don't explain anything, the straight people around you see that many of their prejudices are not confirmed at all. Little by little we can change the world and make it a better place.
"A lesbian relationship is one where the woman is BOTH members in the relationship. That is the point, isn't it?!